Valentine’s Day is just around the corner and cybersecurity experts warn that the season of love is also peak season for romance scams. While people swipe, match and open up online on dating apps and social media, scammers are using AI to scale fake relationships quickly and accurately.
Such romance scams are spreading quickly, and thanks to artificial intelligence, they’re far more convincing than the laborious catfishing attempts of the past. What once seemed easy to spot now looks thoughtful, emotional, and worryingly like real scams. For the victims, the damage is not just emotional. It is often financial in nature and sometimes life-changing.
Why love scams are exploding
Romance scams have quietly become one of the most costly forms of online fraud. According to the U.S. Federal Trade Commission, reported losses from romance scams totaled $1.14 billion in 2023, making them one of the most financially damaging fraud categories tracked by the agency. Regulators say these losses continue to rise as fraud becomes more sophisticated and difficult to detect due to the use of AI.
What sets today’s scams apart is the speed at which trust is established. Instead of composing messages manually, fraudsters are now using large language models (LLMs) to generate emotionally engaging conversations at scale. Messages feel thoughtful and deeply personal, even when sent to hundreds of people at once. Many victims don’t realize something is wrong until money comes into the conversation.
How AI is changing the fraud playbook
Using AI, scammers now adapt in real time and send messages based on a target’s tone of voice, interests or vulnerabilities. Text generation tools help reflect language and emotions so conversations feel natural and responsive.
Voice cloning added another layer of realism. Using short audio samples, fraudsters can recreate a person’s voice to send convincing voice notes or calls.
Some groups are also experimenting with deepfake video chats, using AI-generated images or pre-recorded footage to simulate live interactions. The result is a scam that feels authentic enough to bypass warning signs that people once relied on.
The emotional hook and the money trap
Cybersecurity experts say most romance scams follow a familiar pattern. Darius Kingsley, head of consumer business practices at Chase Bank, says: “Romantic online acquaintances can approach unsuspecting victims to lure them in, either through friendly text messages or on dating apps, and then ask for money or suggest an investment opportunity.”
Here’s a handy checklist of warning signs to look out for:
- The person reports living or working far away, often abroad.
- Your profile looks unusually perfect or professionally curated.
- The relationship escalates very quickly with intense emotional language.
- Promises to meet in person are repeatedly postponed or canceled.
- Conversations shift to money, investments or financial emergencies.
- Cryptocurrency or Forex trading is mentioned early or classified as urgent.
- You are pressured to use a specific payment method.
Here’s how to protect yourself before it’s too late
Experts agree that prevention starts with slowing down because romance scams rely on urgency, secrecy and emotional pressure.
According to Steve Grobman, senior vice president and chief technology officer at McAfee, “a healthy dose of skepticism combined with using the right tools to protect your privacy, identity and personal information is a good place to start.”
Here is a checklist shared by USSFCU to protect yourself from romance scams:
- Approach relationships slowly and be aware of intense emotional connections early on.
- Verify your identity by meeting them in person.
- During a video call, ask the person to turn their head completely or wave their hand in front of their face. Many AI deepfake tools struggle with sudden or exaggerated movements.
- Be careful of visual disturbances, as faces may momentarily distort, freeze, or become disoriented if the software does not track movement properly.
- Note that advanced deepfakes may still pass these tests.
- Never send money, gifts or cryptocurrency to someone you have not met in person.
- Browse profile photos in reverse order to look for reused images.
- Talk to friends or family about new online relationships.
- Lock social media privacy settings to prevent misuse of your data.
When people are emotionally invested, inconsistencies can be more easily overlooked. For this reason, scammers often discourage their victims from discussing the relationship with friends or family, portraying outside concerns as jealousy or misunderstanding.
John Clay, vice president of threat intelligence at Trend Micro, points out that fraudsters use urgency and isolation to bypass rational thought, which is why the outside perspective of trusted family and friends is so important.
A warning for everyone who is currently dating online
Not only are romance scams evolving, they are also becoming harder to detect as AI quietly does much of the work behind the scenes. Valentine’s Day simply increases the risk as people seek contact and lower their guard.
While the technology behind these scams is changing rapidly, the core recommendations remain unchanged. Take your time. Check who you are talking to. Be careful when money, investments, or urgency come into the conversation, especially if you have never met in person.
In an age when algorithms can convincingly simulate care and intimacy, trusting your instincts may still be the most important protection you have.
